Burning Blue | Langst

Chapter One

Lances pov

I was laying in bed once again, thoughts roaming my mind. Tears brinking the corner of my eyes. I was trapped, my thoughts never leaving me. Never going away, always lingering. Sometimes not even up front but they are there. Always keeping me company, never leaving my mind.

That's when I heard a voice on the intercom, "Paladins, you guys are needed in the control panel. We have news!" I groaned, why?

I got up wiping off the tears on my face. I threw on my jacket not daring to have my scars revealed to the world.

I walk out of my room slowly making my way to the control panel. I walk in and see everyone already in there. Allura giving me a death glare, "why are you late!? You are always late can't you ever be on time?" She yells at me. I just mumble a quick, "I'm sorry."

She didn't bother to recognize what I said. She quickly turned her attention to the news at hand. "We have a member of Voltron back." She had a large smile on her face. That's when I heard a knock at the door and quickly whipped around. I saw Keith standing there a smile on his face. I heard the others yelling his name and hugging him. I just stood there, hugging myself I had a sly smile on my face.

I was just gonna stay where I was. Everyone was making conversation with him. I just walked out of the room. I could just stand there and see everyone happy. When I myself ain't happy. I walked back into the place that I call home, my bedroom. I needed to collect myself collect my thoughts.

Why was he back all of a sudden? I was pacing back in forth in my room. Tears filling my eyes. I missed him, why did I miss him? There was no reason to. I was always behind him. I was always in his shadow. So why did I miss him? Why did I feel like I needed him?

I heard a knock on my door which got me out of my thoughts. I dragged my feet towards the door and opened it. I see Keith standing there a smile on his face. I put up my mask making sure he couldn't see the pain that was clearly displayed on my face.

"I wasn't able to come and say hi to you. You left to quickly for me to get a word in." He let out a laugh.

"What are you doing back?" I ask trying to get him to stop talking about me.

"I guess I just missed my friends. I missed my team." He let a smile over come his face.

"Oh, you should go and hang out with them then. You probably have a lot of catching up to do." I try to push him to go and talk to his friends. So he didn't have to worry about me.

He looked at me confused, "Lance. You are my friend. I know that we are enemies and stuff but that doesn't mean we aren't friends either." He paused for a moment looking me up and down trying to see if anything is wrong, "Lance? What's been going on since I left?" He was asking so many questions, it might have only been one it still felt like a lot.

I raise and eyebrow trying to show that I didn't know what he was talking about. Showing that nothing was wrong. That nothing has been going wrong. When in reality everything has been going wrong. How everyone on the team of Voltron has only been telling me how bad I've been doing. How I'm not able to do anything right. How everything I do isn't good enough. How when something goes wrong on a mission it's my fault. How they remind me everyday of how worthless and useless I am. All I said was "everything's fine" giving him a fake smile. Giving him the only thing that I know how to do. The only thing that keeps my walls up. That keeps me from crumbling down.

He looked like he didn't believe me. He walked inside my room closing the door and sitting on my bed. He was patting a spot next to him so that I could sit as well. I walked over and sat down on the bed. Giving him a confused look. "Lance.. you're body language may not say it, you're mouth may even day you're fine. But all of that doesn't matter. You're eyes. There dull. You're not the same anymore. You haven't even cracked a joke, or flirted with Allura and it scares me because I don't know what's going on up in here." He pokes my forehead referencing my head.