DreamNotFound Oneshots

Just Tell Me You Love Me

Art by: JustARaNDoMLoL2
Twitter: JustAPersonL

TW's:
-Mentions homophobia

School had been difficult. I came out as gay a while ago and since that day the whole school knew. I told Sap and Clay, but someone was listening when I told them. Well, school had been a hell since that day. Being gay on a high school, it was difficult, definitely with a crush. Hiding my crush was also difficult. Only Sapnap knew I liked Clay. And not just liked him, I was in love with him.

I had a crush as soon as I met him in the first class. His dirty blond hair with his I guessed green eyes, they were so beautiful. Just the way he sometimes ran his fingertips through his hair, I felt butterflies swirling through my stomach each time. The way he laughed, his soft giggles, but also his wheeze. It made me blush each time, but he didn't know. He didn't know I loved him like that.

He joked around about loving me often, but it was always a joke. Maybe he loved me as a friend, but definitely nothing more. It broke my heart often and I had cried about it a lot of times. Today was such a day again. Clay and I had been joking around for a while and suddenly everything happened again.

'Just tell me you love me,' Clay used to whine.

'No, I'm not doing that,' I whispered. I would mean it and if I was ever going to confess I wanted it to be special.

'Come on, Gogy. I love you. It's not like we are in love with each other. I just love you.'

My heart seemed to be crushed in a thousand pieces. I looked at Sapnap. He looked at me in pity. He smiled softly before I stood up. I grabbed my bag.

'Sorry,' I mumbled. I did love him, how could I make it more obvious?

I ran away and locked myself in a bathroom stall. Tears streamed down my face as I cried harder and harder. He just friend zoned me so hard. I lifted my knees up and hid my face in between my knees. I hated everything.

'George?'

I startled by the sudden voice, it was Sapnap.

'Can you come out of the stall, please?'

'No, leave me alone.'

'I won't, come please.'

I sighed, wiped my tears away and opened the stall.

'You cried?'

'Yes.'

'George, this is difficult, but he didn't mean it wrong. He felt really bad he said.'

'He doesn't even understand, Sapnap. I'm so in love with him.'

'You're in love with me?'

I startled and turned around.

'Clay, shit. I-.'

'George, I'm sorry. It's okay, but I'm not gay-.'

'I know, leave me alone,' I yelled. I pushed him away and ran away harder than I ever did. He didn't love me like I loved him and he would never love me like I loved him. He didn't like boys, there was just no hope for me.

'George, wait,' Clay screamed. He grabbed my shoulders. 'Wait.'

'No, why? For you to hurt me even more? To tell me you're not gay and that I can never get you? I can never get the love of my life? Listen, Clay. You're freaking handsome, you can get everyone in the world, apparently even the boys. It's easy for you, you love someone, ask them out and you have a relationship with them, but it isn't for me. I will get rejected every time. I'm ugly, small and skinny. Oh did I forget to mention? I'm also gay and in love with my best friend. Well ex best friend.'