eight.

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July, 2012

   Missing people is one of my least favourite things to do. When you miss someone, it's like this void is filling your chest and seeing that person is the only way to fix it. I miss everyone, all the time. The only person I see on a constant basis these days is my aunt. I'm happy I at least get to see her because she's one of my favourite people on this Earth, but I miss my other family - to an extent. However, I definitely miss my friends back home and I miss skating with them until three in the morning on summer nights.

   I haven't skated in months because between school and a job, I don't ever have the time. If I do, I'm always too tired so I opt to learn something new on the guitar instead. I mess around with that thing so much now I'm basically as good as Niall.

   Speaking of Niall, I miss him too. And Zayn, Louis, Liam and Harry. I miss all of them. Although they finished tour about a week ago, I have yet to see them. The reason I haven't seen them is because I was with Emma.

   I took a week off of work to fly up to Paris to see Emma. The flight up was awful. I sat somewhere in the middle of the plane, silently freaking out in my head. The only thing someone could see visibly was my hands shaking like they always did. Ten minutes into my flight I couldn't calm my mind, so I decided to distract myself instead. I had a specific playlist of songs that I would listen to on planes. I always forget about it because I'm too busy being caught up with my thoughts. After I remember though, everything starts to calm down again.

   Emma took me to a lot of places that she found and thought I would like, which I truly did. We both ended up getting tattoos, two each to be exact. She got a sun on her ankle because she loves sunny weather and she also got a butterfly right behind her ear. I however got the moon on my own ankle since it's one of my many favourite things. It kind of went with Emma's sun as well. The tattoo that I got next is on my hand and says 'breathe', to remind myself as long as I just breathe, everything will be fine.

 The tattoo that I got next is on my hand and says 'breathe', to remind myself as long as I just breathe, everything will be fine

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   Once the week was over it was kind of hard to say goodbye. I missed seeing her almost everyday like I used to when we both lived in London. She's one of my closest friends, I'd say I'm closer with her than I am with any of my other friends. She's also the only one who knows about me being friends with the boys and who I openly talk to about my feelings.

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