Chapter 46: I Don't Know How To Tell You This.

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[If I had all the words,
I would blurt them all at once,
but they're stuck in all these fragments jammed at the bottom of my lungs]

      I haven't told them yet. And I leave in three days. How am I supposed to tell them? God, I'm so stupid. I should have told them right when I talked to Mr. King about it the first time. Now, this is going to hurt them so much more. I have been able to gather them for a few minutes before they go to bed. I pace and pace debating on ways to tell them. Should I just come out and say it? Or maybe lead up to it? God. 

      "Emily, you're scaring me." I hear Liam say. I nod, I'm scaring myself too. 

      "What is it you wanted to tell us?" Zayn asks as his eyes follow my every move. 

      "I- um." I groan as I grab my head. 

      "You're not pregnant, are you?" Harry asks, already hearing the panic. 

      I shake my head, "No, no. I'm not." 

      "Well then what is it?" Liam asks. Niall is biting his nail nervously. Why is he nervous? 

      "Oh no. Is Nemily over?" Louis asks. Niall and I both look at him. 

      "No!" We say spontaneously. 

      "Okay, okay. Just checking." I continue with my pacing. 

      "It's just really hard to say it." I say quietly. 

      "You know you can tell us, you can tell us anything." Niall assures. I sigh and look up. "It's just..." I can't tell them. I really can't. Goddammit, but I have to! 

      "Emily, it can't get any worse if you were pregnant. Just tell us what's going on." Zayn says. I can't tell them. I can't bring myself to. 

      "I just... Need one of you to go get me tampons." I quickly lie. 

      "That's it?" Harry asks. I stop my pacing and look at them. 

      I nod, "Yeah... I hate asking people to get me my things, and it was really hard to. I mean, wouldn't you be-" 

      "Okay, okay." Niall stands up and holds me by the shoulders and makes me look at him. "I will go get them for you, no biggie. Okay?" I nod and he kisses my forehead before walking out of the room. 

      "What?" I look at the boys. They are all giving me looks that show that they didn't believe my lie. 

      "That wasn't it." Zayn says. 

      I groan, "I hate that you guys can practically read my mind." I grunt sitting in the chair. 

      "What is so hard to say that you had to say you needed tampons instead?" Louis asks sitting on the arm of the chair wrapping an arm around my shoulders. 

      "Please don't tell Niall yet." I whisper already feeling the tears build up. I look down putting my head in my hands. 

      "So, you're not pregnant?" Harry confirms. 

      "Harry!" Liam scolds. 

      "Sorry, sorry." I let out a shaky breath and slightly move side to side as Louis rubs my back. 

      "I-I'm leaving." I finally say. Louis hand stops and I finally look up. 

      "What?" Zayn questions. 

      "Just for a little? Then you'd come back?" Harry asks hopefully. I wet my lips while shaking my head.

      "Mr. King gave me another job offer to work for another band." My voice cracks leaving the last half barley above a whisper. The boys' faces fall. 

      "And you took it?" Liam questions. 

      I nod, "I had to! He said that my career would take off and I'd get more recognition if I did. You know how important my job is to me." I cry. Harry looks as if he'd cry and Zayn puts his head in his hands. 

      "When do you leave?" Louis asks now sitting back on the bed. "In three days." I look down wiping my tears. 

      "Why didn't you tell us sooner?" Harry questions wiping his own tears.

      I shrug, "I didn't know how to. I'm so sorry." I sniffle and stand up. 

      "I'm really really sorry. I wanted to tell you. I really did. But I couldn't bring myself to." Louis is the first to stand up and hug the living life out of me. I don't say anything. I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him back. Soon, everyone's arms are around us. It felt comforting to know that they accepted it and are supporting me. We sat back down just as Niall walked in, He stops in the doorway and looks at us. 

      "Did I miss something?" 

      "I-uh." 

      "She told us about Jessie." Louis is quick to defend me and the rest of the boys nod in agreement wiping away the last of their tears. 

      Niall nods understanding, "Oh, yeah. That just makes me wanna kill him even more. Anyway, I didn't know which ones to get you, so I got you a couple different ones." Niall opens up the plastic bag and shows me the different boxes of tampons. 

      I smile, "Thank you." 

      "Oh and," He pulls out a large bar of chocolate and a couple Redbox DVD's. "I got us a couple movies to watch." I smile again.

      God, how am I going to tell him?

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[I Don't Know How To Tell You This - Faith Ling]

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A/N:

4 more chapters, guys :((((

ily💞💞

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All the love, C. xx

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