Survival Of The Fittest [Jamilams]

Dating is the One Exception to Being Social

~Alex~

John kissed me again which catches me by surprise. Even though we just made out in a closet for 20 minutes.

I hear the sisters saying "aww" and "so cute" and other garbage like that. So i flipped them off. Just held up my middle finger while kissing john. Not exactly romantic but im not a romantic guy.

"Really alex?" Eliza says.

"Hey, if youre immature, then im immature" i state.

"As long as he keeps you alive, im happy"

"What does she mean Alex?" John asks.

"Uhh nothing" i say nervously. Im surprised he doesnt know considering the cuts on my arms.

"So Alex, how about a date later tonight?"

"Wow. And I thought my attempt to ask you out was gonna be bad"

He smiles at my little joke.

"Well where do you want to go? He asks.

"Literally anywhere better than i can afford. So anywhere better than McDonald's"

"Doesn't Washington give you money for stuff?"

"Im a random guy who he unofficially adopted, what do you think?...and he currently he thinks im suicidal, which isnt wrong" I mutter that last part. It looked like he didnt hear.

"Just, take me somewhere nice"

I could see the gears turning in his head to think of where to go. I look at the clock.

"Hey John, I'll see you in class. I gotta stop at the dorm for something"

I go to our dorm before he can object. Of course im not there for any real reason. Its just...

I either hate you or tolerate you

John is that special guy who i love

Oh, and because I can only tolerate being social for so long

I stop by the bathroom to look at myself again. Why wont the bite and scratch mark go away? Just adds on to my problems.

And now john is taking me out for a date. Stress levels are through the roof at this point! What do you even do on a date?

Hhhh... Maybe just this one time...

Hamilton, put the knife down

Yep. Forgot the squip existed

And I take offence that you forgot about me

I guess I don't need to say anything to talk to it

"What do you want?"

I want you to put the knife down

"And if I don't"

You will. I dont think John will take it well if he finds you dead

He's right. He's freaking right. Geez, I bet this is how Jefferson feels when we're debating.

Speaking of Thomas, tell him the truth

"What truth do you speak of?"

Come on, its obvious you have feelings for him

"Yeah, hate"

Hate is such a strong word. How about love?

"Fuck you"

I don't have to take this from a random voice! It can't stop me from doing anything.

Hamilton!

I make 3 cuts on my wrist. Only 3. Im getting better.

I wash off the knife and put it in my pocket. Its only a pocket knife or "mini sword" so its not too suspicious.

I wrap my wrist in bandages and leave for class.

Tho- jefferson. Jefferson was staring at me all day. Probably because john was with me most of the time. Wait a minute.

Is thomas Jefferson jealous?

This is priceless! The, thomas Jefferson is jealous that I found love and he can't! Oh man this is the best. I cant wait to tell John! Or even Herc and laf, i havent talked to them in a while.