Good girl // bad boy

22

"We are here today to remember the happy life grace Walsh lived"

Yes, those words where just spoken.

It's been 2 weeks since grace went into hospital. She was fighting....but one night she stopped. The cancer took over and killed her from the inside.

I have been trying to keep it together but I don't know how much longer I can keep it up, but I feel like if I cry I won't stop.

I look next to me and Dylan is crying.

He has found it really hard, she was a sister to him.

On the other side aunty Jane, She is a wreck.

Me I am emotionless, I still feel numb to the idea of her being dead. I still feel like maybe I will see her laughing again and it will of all been a dream.

"I would like to call up emma Walsh to say some words" the director says and I get up and stand in front of everyone of came to the funeral.

"Thank you everyone for coming" I say. I look down at my speech I had prepared then back up at the people gathered around and there hurt faces "I know grace impacted everyone's lives here in Someway, and damn did she have a way of getting under you skin in the best way" I laugh "she was always the light in a dark time and even through her dark times she was her own light. Grace was shy didn't really like talking to strangers she was lonely and she found it hard to get by and I could tell, one day she meet my friend at the time Dylan and I hadn't seen her that happy in awhile. They became besties and she fought for him and me and everyone here but there comes a time when you just can't fight anymore" I say and Dylan smiles at me "I knew she was fighting, but I as a sister thought it was my choice to whether she lived or let go. But it wasn't it was hers so I told her she could let go if she couldn't fight anymore and she did exactly that. She will forever live within watching over us cause she let go on her choice she wants to be there and help us trough life" I say "I will miss you grace, but I will see you soon" I say and take my seat

-

The memorial ends and everyone hugs me and share stories. But eventually everything clears out and it's me in front of her tombstone.

"I miss you already" I tell her

I go back to Dylan's house and walk in

"Hey" Dylan says hugging me

"Hey" I say holding him

We haven't really seen each other much over the last 2 weeks and I can't imagine where I would rather be right now.

"I don't know how I can do this Dylan" I finally speak

"I was beginning to think you lost all feelings" he laughs as he brushes a tear that had escaped me

"I don't wanna feel the pain" I tell him

"Pain demands to be felt love" he tells me quoting fault in our stars

"She's gone" I cry and he holds me to his chest and takes me to his room as I break down

"Let is out em, I am here" he tells me as I sob and let what I have been holding in for 2 weeks

I cry till I don't have tears left

We lay in silence

"You know she is going to be mad that you haven't started packing for New York" he tells me and I laugh

"Yeah I guess" I sniff

"Hey" He says sitting up and looking at me "we are going to New York in 2 months and we are going to live our lives and she is going to watch over us as we make mistakes and set goals. She is going to be so proud of you when you discover a cure to some illness she is going to be proud that you learnt to live without her she will be proud when I finally decide what the hell I am going to do with my life" he tells me and I know he is right

"I know, I just wish she would of been able to come visit us in New York and she could of gone to high school" I tell him

"Well she will come to New York and she can live without high school" he laughs and I nod and let a laugh slip

"I love you dylan" I tell him sitting up and hugging him

"I love you to em, we are going to get through this together" he tells me and I nod

"Yeah we will" I smile for the first time in awhile.

-

I start driving home but stop by her grave

"I know I was only here a few hours ago but I am back sorry" I laugh "I am going to continue my life but please make sure your around cause I am always going to need you to get through life, I love you sis and I always will. The apartment is really nice you can come visit whenever you want to" I cry "Where gonna get through this"

I get home to the empty house Mum and dad haven't come home since grave went into hospital.

I walk through the house and up to graces room and look at all her things.

I can't help but smile about the memories even though they hurt like hell.

She will never be fully gone to me, she will always be around to see me make mistakes over and over again and she will be around when I do the right things

"I love you grace" I say sitting down on her bed

"I always will"