Whispers in the Pages

Diary entry 44

August 30, 2019

Dear Diary,

It's been a while since I last wrote to you. The past two weeks have been quite a rollercoaster of emotions, but you know what? I've decided to be lively and hilarious today, just like old times, even if life is throwing lemons at me.

So, here's the deal - I've accepted my fate. I know I don't have much time left, and no matter how hard I try, nothing will change. It's written in the stars or whatever cosmic force controls our destinies. Perhaps, God just wanted to give me a taste of this beautiful fairytale I was living, only to snatch it away within a blink.

But you know what's hilarious? It's been two months, and they still haven't found a heart donor for me. I mean, who in their right mind would give their heart to someone else? Nobody wants to die, and everyone's greedy for life, just like me. So, I've been waiting, patiently, but it's like the universe is playing a cruel joke on me.

Anyway, I had a little unexpected encounter at the hospital. Taehyung's dad, Mr. Kim, was there visiting a friend, and I bumped into him as I was lost in my thoughts. He asked what I was doing there, and I couldn't hold myself back. I ended up pouring my heart out to him, sharing everything about the disease I'm facing. And you know what? He was so concerned and worried for me that I couldn't help but break down in his arms. Mr. Kim is such a caring person, and I'm grateful for his comforting presence.

I made him promise not to tell Taehyung about my condition. I can't bear to see him cry. Mr. Kim agreed to keep it a secret and promised to do everything in his power to save me. He assured me that everything will be fine and asked me not to worry. It feels good to have someone else know about my pain, someone who can take care of Taehyung if something happens to me.

But enough of my sob story, Diary. I've been living in depression for far too long, dreading every day that it may be my last. I can't do that anymore. I want to make the most of the time I have left and create beautiful memories with Taehyung. So, I've asked him to write a bucket list, and let me tell you, it's the cutest thing ever.

Taehyung wants to go fishing with me, watch sunset and sunrise together, write a message and send it in a water bottle into the sea, write a love letter, make a scrapbook of memories, bake cookies, and stargaze together. How can I not fulfill these wishes? They are so simple and full of love, just like Taehyung.

He asked me for my bucket list, and you know what? I only have one wish - to spend years with Taehyung, to love him and cherish him, until my last breath. That's all I'm asking for.

I wish God bless me by letting me live to fullfill my only wish!

So starting tomorrow, I'll embark on this mission to fulfill Taehyung's wishes, to make every moment with him count. Who knows, maybe I'll get a new hope along the way. But for now, I'll focus on creating beautiful memories with the love of my life.

With a mix of emotions and a determination to make the most of my time,

Jungkook