chapter fifty-nine // miss him

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russian not translated in-story will be in comments!

also the cdc developmental milestones chart is my reference for writing maia. like i deadass don't know i don't have kids but the cdc says she's doin just fine 😌

-

Emily was making breakfast when the alarm clock went off. You rushed out of bed to shut it off so it didn't bother JJ. She had jumped at the grating sound. "Sorry," you grumbled as you got back into bed to wake her up a little softer. JJ smiled and let you climb next to her. "Didn't mean for that to scare you,"

"It's alright," she murmured. "What time is it?" You started to stroke her hair and put one hand on her belly.

"Six. Emily's making breakfast. How did you sleep, Jayje?"

"Good. Thank you, for being so good to me. I know you don't have to be. Believe me, I am not taking it for granted." You smiled and rubbed her belly.

"I know you're not, honey. Hey, I don't think Spence knows you're here, unless Emily told him, so will you be okay if I go talk to him? I'll be back,"

"Yeah, of course, Y/N, I'm fine."

You hopped down the stairs to your family at the table. Emily grinned, standing in front of the stove. "Good morning, my love!"

"Hey, Ems. Hey, Spence,"

"Good morning, Y/N." You went over to your baby girl and tickled her in her high chair.

"Hello, sweet Maia! How are you this morning, my lovey? Милая, милая, доброе утро, моя солнышка..."

"Ты говоришь с ней по-русски?" asked Spencer.

"А, я немного говорю с ней по-русски, но я не отлично говорю на нем, поэтому не часто говорю на нем." He nodded at you and went about eating his breakfast. "Actually, Spencer, can I talk to you about something?"

"Of course, give me one second." He shoved the last of the eggs into his mouth and came with you. You shared a look with Emily before taking Spencer into the living room.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm about to throw a lot of information at you and you're gonna have to get on board real quick. Can you do that?"

"Y/N, I'm worried, what's going on?"

"Alright. JJ's upstairs in mine and Emily's bed right now, she slept here last night. She's a lesbian, she came out to Will the other day, he's pissed, he's fighting for full custody of Henry and kicked JJ out of her own house. She's gonna stay here, pending yours and Emily's approval obviously, but she's going through it right now and she needs us. Got all that?"

"Yeah. Yeah, how can I help her?"

"I'll let you know. Just, not keeping that from you. But, uh, do not tell anybody about this, okay? JJ told me all this in confidence and I have express permission to tell you, and Emily, who already knows. We good, Spence?"

His eyes were wide when he nodded. "Yes. Let me know how I could help." He hugged you and you guys went back to the kitchen.

"Em...could I get your opinion on something really quick? You too, Spence?"

"Yeah, what's up, love?"

"Mm-hmm?"

"Jayje doesn't have any place to stay...I was wondering—"

"She should stay here," Emily said before you could even finish.

"Yeah?"

"Absolutely," replied Spencer. Maia babbled in her chair and shoved banana in her face. Spencer rubbed her hair with a dorky smile.

"Oh. That's a lot easier a conversation than I expected. Can I go tell her this? I want to give her some good news, make her feel maybe a little better?" Emily gave you a smile, her face full of admiration and love.

JJ smiled when you came back to bed. She made grabby hands at you and you hopped back into bed. She snuggled into you, your body fitting perfectly with hers. "I talked to Emily and Spencer. We're happy to have you here. You're gonna get through this, and the three of us are all right here for you, yeah? We care so much about you, Jayje."

She turned her head to hide in your chest. A couple tears wet your shirt. "Oh, honey, don't cry...shh, it's okay, you're okay, JJ..."

She wasn't okay, not remotely, but for a few moments, you holding her in bed, or sleeping softly between you and your wife like a young child who'd had a nightmare, at least someone loved her, truly, for who she was.

-

Work was difficult for JJ, but she made it through a painful day. She took her own car both ways, and was so relieved to be home at the end of her long day. Spencer picked up Maia and let her play while Emily made you all dinner. You read on the couch so you could watch her, and JJ sat on the floor. Maia tried to walk over to see her, laughing when she'd crash on the floor.

"Miss Maia, are you being silly?" JJ put on a goofy baby voice. "Are you being silly?" She made Maia laugh, the sweetest sound to your ears.

"See!" giggled Maia, trying to say 'silly'. She clapped and crawled to JJ. Your little one was an avid crawler, and tried to walk, but that didn't get her far. She climbed into JJ's lap and wriggled around, giggling and clapping for herself. You closed your book and smiled. "Mommy!"

"Oh, good job, милая!"

"Mi-la!" You laughed with pride at her attempt to say your term of endearment for her.

"Yeah, милая, good girl!" you praised. JJ tickled her and she laughed loudly. Spencer came in and sat down beside you.

"JJ, you're sweet with her." Spencer got down and poked Maia in the belly. JJ smiled to hide the tears in her eyes. "My lovely little girl. Papa loves you, my baby girl." He kissed your daughter's head and picked her up. "Are you hungry, my lovey? Yeah?"

He took Maia to the table and put her in her high chair, leaving you and JJ. You looked back over at her, her hands clasped in front of her lower face and the smile still on her face as she let the tears fall. "You alright, Jayje?"

She snapped out of it, turned up to you, and dried her eyes. "What? Oh, I'm...sorry, ha, this is..."

"It's completely alright, honey."

JJ, that night, said, "I don't know why I got so emotional." You handed her and Emily each a glass of wine. "I'm really sorry, Y/N,"

"God, Jayje, don't apologize. I get it,"

"Really? 'Cause I don't," JJ tried to chuckle. Emily took her hand. "Sorry,"

"You're alright, hon. You have nothing to be sorry for." JJ leaned against Emily and sighed.

"Why am I so upset? Maia's perfect, she's the sweetest little kid, I love being her godmother, and spending time with her, I don't know why...I'm not even upset, really, I'm just...just overwhelmed. I..." She sighed.

"Jayje...you miss him, don't you?" said Emily, rubbing JJ's shoulder. JJ nodded, closed her eyes, and leaned against Emily.

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